Pure_Evil
06-04-2005, 07:26 PM
One day, while walking down the street a highly successful HR Director
was tragically hit by a bus, and she died. Her soul arrived up in
heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.
"Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in
though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've
never once had a Human Resources Director make it this far, and we're
not really sure what to do with you."
"No problem, just let me in," said the woman.
"Well, I'd like to," replied St. Peter, "but I have higher orders.
What we're going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in
Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an
eternity in."
"Actually, I think I've made up my mind, I prefer to stay in Heaven",
said the woman.
"Sorry, we have rules..." And with that St. Peter put the executive
in an elevator and it went down-down-down to hell. The doors opened,
and she found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a
beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club, and
standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives that
she had worked with - and they were all dressed in evening gowns and
cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and they
talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf, and
at night went to the country club, where she enjoyed an excellent
steak and lobster dinner. She met the Devil, who was actually a
really nice guy (kinda cute) and she had a great time telling jokes
and dancing. She was having such a good time that before she knew it,
it was time to leave. Everybody shook her hand and waved goodbye as
she got on the elevator.
The elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates, and
she found St. Peter waiting for her. "Now it's time to spend a day in
heaven," he said. So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on
clouds and playing the harp and singing. She had a great time, and
before she knew it, her 24 hours were up and St. Peter came and got
her.
"So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in heaven. Now
you must choose your eternity," he said.
The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought
I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I
think I had a better time in Hell." So St. Peter escorted her to the
elevator and again she went down-down-down back to Hell.
When the doors of the elevator opened, she found herself standing in a
desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends
were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in
sacks. The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.
"I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and
there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we
danced and had a great time. Now, all there is is a wasteland of
garbage and all my friends look miserable."
The Devil looked at her and smiled. "Yesterday, we were recruiting
you, today you're staff."
was tragically hit by a bus, and she died. Her soul arrived up in
heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.
"Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in
though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've
never once had a Human Resources Director make it this far, and we're
not really sure what to do with you."
"No problem, just let me in," said the woman.
"Well, I'd like to," replied St. Peter, "but I have higher orders.
What we're going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in
Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an
eternity in."
"Actually, I think I've made up my mind, I prefer to stay in Heaven",
said the woman.
"Sorry, we have rules..." And with that St. Peter put the executive
in an elevator and it went down-down-down to hell. The doors opened,
and she found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a
beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club, and
standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives that
she had worked with - and they were all dressed in evening gowns and
cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and they
talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf, and
at night went to the country club, where she enjoyed an excellent
steak and lobster dinner. She met the Devil, who was actually a
really nice guy (kinda cute) and she had a great time telling jokes
and dancing. She was having such a good time that before she knew it,
it was time to leave. Everybody shook her hand and waved goodbye as
she got on the elevator.
The elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates, and
she found St. Peter waiting for her. "Now it's time to spend a day in
heaven," he said. So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on
clouds and playing the harp and singing. She had a great time, and
before she knew it, her 24 hours were up and St. Peter came and got
her.
"So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in heaven. Now
you must choose your eternity," he said.
The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought
I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I
think I had a better time in Hell." So St. Peter escorted her to the
elevator and again she went down-down-down back to Hell.
When the doors of the elevator opened, she found herself standing in a
desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends
were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in
sacks. The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.
"I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and
there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we
danced and had a great time. Now, all there is is a wasteland of
garbage and all my friends look miserable."
The Devil looked at her and smiled. "Yesterday, we were recruiting
you, today you're staff."